Consent: The Secret to Making Employees More Receptive to Feedback
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No matter how you phrase it, when you provide feedback, you’re essentially pointing out to an individual what they’re doing wrong or what their flaws are. This can put anyone in defense mode.
How you deliver the feedback, when you do so, and where are all predictors of how the recipient will react. One wrong word or incorrect use of tone? Next thing you know, your report makes a voodoo doll out of you and sticks needles in your arm. So, you can either:
Stop reading here and tiptoe around the subject with your reports.
Use this single action below to lead your reports to be more receptive to feedback.
Start the conversation with this one question:
Do I have permission to give you feedback?
Or the various alternatives used by numerous managers:
Do I have permission to coach you?
Are you interested in hearing some feedback?
Can I give you some constructive criticism?
Do you mind if I give you feedback on ___X___?
I have some feedback if you’re open to it.
Are you open to some feedback?
The answer will almost always be “yes” because reports often feel they can’t say no to their manager. However, that’s not the point. Asking this simple question shifts the report’s mindset to expect and be ready for feedback.
In the case a report does say “no”, this is good, too. It’s unlikely they mean they don’t want feedback. They might be in the middle of an important task, or having a terrible day, or something else. Whatever it is, find out, then follow up with asking, “when would be a good time for you?”
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