9 Elegant Ways to Respond to Feedback
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Looking for elegant ways to respond to criticism and negative feedback? Check out 9 ways you can respond.
Leaning Into the Suggestion
I’d love to try it that way. Do you have an example or template I can follow?”
“I’d love to try it that way” demonstrates that you are open and receptive to their feedback.
The follow-up phrase “Do you have an example or template I can follow?” demonstrates sincerity. That is, you’re interested in trying their suggestion by modeling it after an example.
Lastly, it’s a very positive statement that doesn’t come across as defensive.
I’d love to try it that way. Who would you say does <your suggestion> well?
“Who does that well?” is a polite and productive way to get more details about what the other person is looking for. This is a very similar approach to asking for an example or template.
Thank you for pointing that out. I will fix that now.
This is one of the best responses to feedback. Unlike the other suggestions,
“I will fix that now” shows that you will take immediate action to solve the problem.
This shows personal responsibility. Managers and peers alike like the action-oriented approach. It also gives them the result they really want: closing an open issue.
Speaking Up
I have a different perspective on the situation. Would you like to hear it?
It’s usually dangerous to refute or share a different perspective on the situation. The other party may interpret your alternative view as being defensive and refusing responsibility for the criticism they’ve given you.
However, there are times when you must share your viewpoint on the matter. Phrasing it this way improves the chances of it being polite, respectful, and most important of all, non-threatening.
Okay
I appreciate you sharing your thoughts. Can I have a bit of time to think about it and then follow up with you in a few days to discuss it?
Asking for time to process and respond to feedback is okay.
The time frame of “in a few days” could lead the other person to feel you are avoiding a difficult conversation. Instead, give a definitive date to follow up which demonstrates you are taking the feedback seriously.
Remember, it might not always be okay to take a few days, but most parties understand that you might need 24 hours to process the criticism.
Could be Argumentative
You’re right. I didn’t put much time into that project. I thought the X project was the top priority. Did I misunderstand that?
While this response seems like it is taking responsibility, to the other person it may come across as defensive and deflecting personal responsibility.
Instead, if you realize the other person is missing relevant information; give a brief explanation as to why you thought project X was the top priority.
Sharing relevant information should not come across defensively as long as you maintain an openness to the feedback being received and a positive tone throughout your communication.
Sounds Good But Isn’t
The situations below are not suggestions, rather are examples of unconstructive responses.
I didn’t realize it was a problem. Thank you for bringing it up. I appreciate that.
While it appears as if one is leaning into the feedback, leading with “I didn’t realize it was a problem” could convey to the other person you are deflecting responsibility and lacking awareness.
Deflecting responsibility could lead the other person to respond defensively.
Instead, they would prefer you respond with a solution that shows humility and demonstrates you will make a change now that the problem is brought to your attention.
I’m sorry you’re unhappy. Would changing X improve the problem?
While apologizing and acknowledging one’s emotions is valuable, it is not going to solve the problem.
Instead, acknowledge their emotions and provide a solution.
Remember, the person taking the time to provide you feedback is ultimately trying to help you and your performance so it is important to show appreciation.
I hadn’t looked at it that way. I’ll try it your way next time.
While this may appear as if one is taking responsibility, the other person may be upset that you’re taking action at some unspecified time in the future.
Instead, they would prefer if you would take action immediately, as in the next few seconds.
Also, the phrase “I hadn’t looked at it that way” could convey that you have low self-awareness and poor judgment.
Conclusion
While receiving critical feedback can be difficult, feedback is crucial in bettering yourself, your performance, and your overall career. Giving and receiving feedback is a key part of being an effective leader and employee. Good feedback is facilitated through honest, goal-oriented, and open communication where both members feel heard.
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