How Managers Can Deal with Upholders, Obligers, Rebels, and Questioners from the Four Tendencies Book
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I recently came across the book, The Four Tendencies, book by Gretchen Rubin. My colleague, Emily, shared her thoughts about the Four Tendencies book, and I decided to chime in too.
I’m a huge believer in situational leadership. I believe Four Tendencies helps managers identify employees’ preferred work style. We’ve seen other personality test frameworks to help managers deduce the work style of their team including MBTI and the four color personality test.
In this article, I’ll discuss specific strategies managers can use to get the most out of their employees based on their tendencies. For more topics like this, subscribe to The Thoughtful Leader newsletter to discover exceptional leadership insights to elevate your team's performance.
What are the Four Tendencies
Upholders
Upholders respond readily to outer and inner expectations. They wake up and think: “What’s on the schedule and the to-do list for today?” They want to know what’s expected of them, and to meet those expectations. They avoid making mistakes or letting people down—including themselves
Obligers
Obligers meet outer expectations, but struggle to meet inner expectations. They’re motivated by external accountability; they wake up and think, “What must I do today?”
Questioners
Questioners question all expectations, and they respond to an expectation only if they conclude that it makes sense—in essence, they meet only inner expectations. They’re motivated by reason, logic, and fairness. They wake up and think, “What needs to get done today, and why?”
Rebels
Rebels resist all expectations, outer and inner alike. They choose to act from a sense of choice, of freedom. Rebels wake up and think, “What do I want to do today?”
How to Manage Upholders
Upholders love rules. Rules make expectations clear, and they love to uphold expectations. In other words, every I will be dotted and every T will be crossed.
To manage upholders effectively, be as precise as possible about your expectations. Don’t feel like you’re overstepping your bounds by being too prescriptive. They will appreciate:
Reminders
Set routines
Scheduled time blocks for tasks
How to Manage Obligers
Obligers are similar to upholders in the sense that they love to meet other people’s deadlines. However, unlike upholders, obligers are terrible at setting their own deadlines.
To manage obligers effectively, set deadlines for them.
Some of you may be thinking: Is this really necessary? After all, they're professionals. They can manage their own work.
Others will think: I'm the last person who should be setting deadlines for them. It's not like I'm doing the work. They doing it. They should tell me when they can get something done.
Don’t feel that way. They’ll thank you for setting deadlines because it’s easier for them to be accountable to others than to themselves.
How to Manage Questioners
Here are some ways to manage questioners effectively:
Explain the why. They won't do anything if they don't understand the goal or purpose.
Share the plan. Questioners struggle with tasks if they don’t know the destination. So make a plan. They’ll feel better if they understand how you plan to go from point A to B.
Don’t take it personally. Their questions aren’t meant to attack or reject a course of action. They’re just uncomfortable with the proposed course of action and are looking for information to alleviate their feelings.
How to Manage Rebels
Rebels want to get things done in their own time. If someone pushes them to do it, they become even more resistant. They hate schedules, and they do not care about their reputation. Even something as simple as an email with the subject line "Action Required" can cause them to respond late or not at all. Many rebels are even happy to be different or independent.
Rebels can often work better when there are no expectations.
Here are some ways you can deal with rebels effectively:
Give them space. They value freedom above all else. Nagging, reminders, and regular checkins will only remind them that they’re being suffocated. They love to operate freely within a general charter.
Give them a choice. If you give them three to four choices, the choices make rebels feel like they’re in charge. You, the manager, should present the choices. This will limit their ability to roam too far from the company’s objectives.
Use reverse psychology. Rebels love to prove others wrong. So apply some reverse psychology. Tell them that the task or goal you intended cannot be accomplished. They'll take that as a challenge and be all the more determined to prove you wrong.
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